5.3 The Ten Commandments

5.3 The Ten Commandments ious endeavour on the part of the married couple to pursue their path of life together in love and the fear of God. Marriage, as it corresponds to God’s will, is an image of Christ’s fellowship with His church and is therefore holy. It obliges both partners to honour and love one another (Ephesians 5: 25, 28–33). Marriage is intended to be indissolu- ble until death: “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matthew 19: 6). In view of this, it is advisable to protect and nurture marriage. 5.3.7.2 Adultery In general terms, any married person who has sexual intercourse with some- one other than his/her spouse, or any unmarried person who has sexual inter- course with a married person, commits adultery. According to the words of Jesus: “But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5: 28), “adultery of the heart” can occur despite an outwardly blameless conduct of life. This commandment is not only violated by committing the actual act of adultery, but already when it is played out in thought (Mark 7: 20–23). 5.3.7.3 Divorce In the New Testament, divorce is assessed as sin: “Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate” (Mark 10: 9). The only exception in which divorce was permissible was in the case of adultery committed by one’s spouse (Matthew 19: 9). The gospel of Mark describes the remarriage of a divorced person as adul- tery (Mark 10: 11–12). According to further statements in the New Testa- ment, divorce and remarriage during the lifetime of the divorced spouse are violations of the Sixth Commandment. Remarriage after divorce was appar- ently—though with certain exceptions—not accepted in the early Christian congregations (1 Corinthians 7: 10–11, 39; Romans 7: 2–3). 237 5 God’s commandments The New Testament’s statements concerning divorce need to be seen in the historical and social context of the ancient world: they served, above all, to improve the situation of women, who only had very limited rights. The wo- man was to be protected from being arbitrarily cast aside by her husband. The abovementioned quotations from the Bible notwithstanding, the church still faces the question of how to deal with divorced persons. Here the overall personal circumstances are to be taken into account. It can be difficult to make decisions that correspond to the spirit of the gospel. It should always be kept in mind that Jesus did not deal with mankind in the spirit of the leg- alities of the old covenant, but in the spirit of love and grace (John 8: 2–11). Like any other sin, adultery and divorce require forgiveness. When a mar- riage ends in divorce, it is usually the case that both partners have contributed to it. The degree of individual guilt may vary. For example, there are cases in which one partner may use violence or may not wish to maintain the mar- riage. It is therefore good for both partners to earnestly examine themselves and take stock of the personal idiosyncrasies and modes of conduct that have contributed to the situation. Separated and divorced persons are not excluded from receiving the sacra- ments. They have their place in the congregation and are cared for by their ministers in unbiased fashion. Divorced persons who wish to remarry and who request a wedding bless- ing will receive it. This is to provide them with an opportunity for a new start. 5.3.7.4 Holy conduct in marriage Marriage should be honoured and the matrimonial bed kept “undefiled” (Hebrews 13: 4). The insight that the body of a reborn individual is the dwell- ing place of God, and also the property of the Most High, results in the obli- gation to live a holy life (1 Corinthians 6: 19–20). This applies in particular to one’s conduct in marriage (1 Thessalonians 4: 3–4; see also 13.3). 238